Does Marriage Counseling Really Work?

does marriage counseling really workIf you’ve had or are presently having marital problems I’m sure you’ve asked yourself, “Does marriage counseling really work?” Many people in your situation ask themselves the same question regularly. The problem with a lot of modern marriage counseling is that it is not based on any REAL working theories. A lot of therapists base their advice on the same theories that your hairdresser may base their advice on.

OK I know… your hairdresser may be trying to help… but your hairdresser is probably giving you bad advice. Where does someone like this get their theories about a perfect marriage from?

These perfect marriage theories inundate people on a regular basis. Just turn on your TV, open up a magazine, or read a newspaper and I’m sure that you will get a good dose of relationship advice. These theories and images of the perfect marriage are being spoon fed to everyone on a regular basis. They are deeply imbedded in our culture… and most people do not even realize that they truly do not know what they are talking about when they choose to give relationship advice.

I was sick of all the terrible advice I was getting about saving my marriage!

Click Here & Read My Story.

So how does this affect you?

The problem with these misconceptions is that it’s very likely that they have started making their ways into your therapist’s office. Your therapist may not even realize it, but they are probably employing the same methods everyone has heard of before wether it be on TV or in the movies.

Does Marriage Counseling Really Work? – Better Communication

does marriage counseling workHave you ever been told that you need to learn how to resolve your conflicts with communication?

It’s pretty easy to understand why everyone can make this generalized statement… because, in a way, it’s common sense… right? The problem with people who are in the heat of a conflict are not thinking about communicating. They are generally thinking about winning this little conflict that they are having.

Read How I Finally Saved My Marriage Here.

As the conflict continues you become super focused on how hurt you feel and on winning the fight that your lines of communication become overwhelmed by your feelings or shut down all together. So, it makes sense for people to tell you to calmly and lovingly listen to each others problems. Unfortunately that is a lot harder to do than it is to say.

Does Marriage Counseling Really Work? – Active Listening

Almost all marital counselors use active listening in one form or another to try to help you get through the rough patches in your marriage. For example, they might moderate some sort of a listen then speak type of exchange where one person tells the other their feelings using statements that start with “I” to avoid accusing the other person.

It is then the listener’s responsibility to paraphrase what was said to him or her to show that they were listening to the speaker. The listener is then asked to validate the speakers feelings by letting them know that they are legitimate and that they respect them even if they don’t agree with them.

Active listening is though to force couples to see their differences from the others perspective. In theory this should allow communication channels to open up for talks without anger.

The only problem is that this form of communication doesn’t really work!

Save My Marriage taught me that active listening should NEVER be used during a fight! Click Here & Read More About It.

It’s estimated that marital therapy only has a 35% success rate in the long run. Does marriage counseling really work? In the traditional sense I feel that a 35% success rate is really pitiful. In the long run the current approaches to marital therapy really have no benefit to the couples in them.